Do you want to express your gratitude towards the persons who attended or will attend your bridal ceremony or reception? Well, all you have to do is to send them a message in which you say how much you appreciate the fact that they were there with you, in the special day that celebrated your union with your spouse. Read this article to find out how and what to write in wedding thank you cards that you have the moral responsibility to dispatch. More exactly, I present in this post four of the most useful tips regarding this ethical obligation.
Contrary to what most people believe, the great atmosphere at any wedding reception is created not only by the guests, but also by the assistants, i.e. by those that contribute to the organization of the reception. Well, all these contributors need a reward for their effort (and results, of course). The most appropriate manner of rewarding them is to send each of them a wedding thank you card (wording samples for such letter are provided by numerous websites and resources), right after the marriage reception. This simple act also allows the newlyweds (i.e. the persons that have just married) and their families to indicate and communicate their appreciation and gratitude for the whole work and effort of the addressees.
Wedding Thank You Card Wording Tips and Examples
Of course, this simple act of gratitude is not enough, you have to do it in the right manner, in order to have the positive effect that you expect. But what is this right manner? This appropriate manner concerns, first of all, the content, that is the wording for wedding thank you cards. The most important thing that can be said about this content refers to its main subject (or the principal theme or even the major topic, if you want). Naturally, the main subject of such a short informal letter of gratitude is… well, which other than the gratitude itself?
Now that you discovered that the ideas that you will include in the thanking note must develop around the gratitude theme, it’s time to find out the second most important thing about the content, which reveals what to write in wedding thank you cards. Interesting formulations for the topics that you can cover in the thanking notes are provided by many resources available on the Internet. The central topic must be your appreciation for the recipients’ effort (financial or of any other kind) and for the fact that they were present at the bridal reception.
Another interesting topic that you may include in the thanking cards that you intend to dispatch refers to the things that you did (or that you intend to do) with the money that you received (from the persons who either attended the reception or just sent money, without attending the party). The wedding thank you card wording samples or templates that are presented in various places on the Internet (I refer to the websites that are specialized on this interesting subject, i.e. those dealing with the gratitude cards that ought to be dispatched to the wedding participants).
In addition to the main subject, there is another important aspect related to the content of these thanking messages, and this aspect concerns the tone of the content. More precisely, you have to choose the tone of the wedding thank you cards wording so that it will be congruent with the relationship between the sender and the recipient. More exactly, the warmth of the message must be directly proportional to the warmth of the corresponding relationship.
In other words, here is what I am trying to tell you: on the one hand, the more close the addressee is to the newlyweds or to their parents, the more friendly this gratitude message should be; on the other hand, the more distant (or even unknown) a recipient is to any of the persons from the aforementioned categories of people (the bride, the groom or one of their parents), the more formal the wedding thank you notes wording should be. If what I have just explained seems a little too theoretical (and difficult to understand) to you, let me offer you a simple example: the friends and the closest family members (i.e. those with whom the newlyweds or their parents get along pretty well) ought to receive friendly thanking letters, while to the other couples or persons you ought to dispatch formal letters.
While reading the paragraphs of this article, a simple question is very likely to have crossed your mind, and the main idea of this question is this: What are the persons to whom gratitude messages ought to be dispatched? (this means that not only the wedding thank you card wording is important, but also the categories of addressees). Well, besides the persons who attended the reception, the absents that sent presents and also the assistants should receive thanking notes.
4 Tips for a Successful Wedding Thank You Card Wording
The hints revealed below are not, of course, mandatory to be used, but they are very helpful and you have only to benefit from these important pieces of advice. I must also tell you that these little secrets make references not only to the text of the cards, but also to the way of composing, writing and delivering these messages. If you have some queries regarding any of the topics discussed in the paragraphs below or even other aspects that have not been dealt with in the following sections, aspects that are related, however, to the wedding thank you notes, I highly encourage you to express your questions, concerns, thoughts and even doubts by posting a comment to this article or to any article in this website. It would be great, of course, if you would publish your opinion at the article that is mostly related to your comment.
Classify the Attendees and Create Message Templates
If you’re stressed about the great number of messages that you have to compose, relax! I have a wonderful news for you: you don’t have to write an unique note for each of the attendees. It’s perfectly okay to have only a few templates that you will fill in for these guests. For doing this, it’s necessary, first of all, to group the persons to whom you will send thank you cards in several categories, according to some criteria, such as:
- the type of relationship that you, your spouse or any of your parents have with them;
- whether they were present at the bridal ceremony or reception, or they only sent you presents;
- the type of gift that offered or sent to you and your spouse, the newlyweds;
- the type of service that they offered to you; I refer here to the wedding aides and especially to the bridesmaids and groomsmen;
- whether they came alone, with their partners or with their families at the ceremony or reception.
Then, you compose a message template for each such category of recipients.
By the way, do you know who are the individuals to whom you ought to dispatch these gratitude messages? Well, think a little: who deserves to receive such a note? The right answer is: all the persons who attended your wedding reception, as well as all the persons who sent gifts to you or to your spouse. Now, let’s get back to the main topic of the tip presented in this section: the classification. It is necessary for deciding on the wedding thank you card wording, so it’s worth doing it.
What about the relationship with the recipients? Well, there are many kinds of relations that might be between any of the newlyweds and some attendees, such as: friendship, fellowship, family relation, comradeship, etc. Let me suggest you now a classification based on relationship, which you can use and which is not, obviously, compulsory:
- the closest friends of you or of your spouse;
- the closest members of your family or of your other half’s family;
- the rest of the family members;
- your or your spouse’s colleagues, high school and college classmates;
- the persons who helped you to organize the reception or the ceremony.
It’s essential to be aware that there might be actually two sub-categories for each of the first four categories of addressees, based on the b) criterion mentioned above:
- those who were invited to the reception and didn’t come, but sent gifts to you and to your spouse;
- those who were present at the reception.
We can talk about nine groups of addressees so far. But these nine groups can also be divided into sub-groups, based on the type of gift and service; that is to say, based on the c) and d) criteria previously mentioned. And so on. I hope you got the picture. Although the final number of groups of persons to whom you ought to dispatch gratitude messages can be pretty large, don’t worry: it’s still much lower to the total number of attendees.
Another important aspect of these groups of attendees refers to whether they came alone to the reception or with their partners or even with their children. You should send a single note to each couple or small family.
Adapt the Tone of the Gratitude Message
This is probably the most important hint related to the wording for wedding thank you cards that you will ever read: you need to make sure that the tone, or style, of each note that you send is suitable for its recipient. To put it more accurately, it’s highly recommended to adjust the general attitude of every message template to the type of relationship that you or your spouse have with the category of addressees of that message. This tone can be:
- warm, for the closest friends and family members;
- amiable, for the other family members, the colleagues and classmates;
- formal, for the wedding assistants and the persons that neither you, nor your spouse and nor any of your parents know.
You can see now why it is so important to use the first tip described in this article: based on the relationships identified when applying the first hint, you set the tone of the corresponding message template. The point of this second tip is to make sure that the degree of friendliness of the tone of the wedding thank you notes is congruent with the degree of warmth of your or your spouse’s relationship with the corresponding category of recipients. So, while composing these gratitude messages, you should pay attention not only to the text of your note, but also to its style, which must be suitable for the relationship between you or your other half and the addressee of that note.
Imagine Yourself in the Place of the Recipient
An useful hint for choosing correctly the wording of each gratitude message is to put yourself in the place of the person, couple or family to whom the note is addressed. Try to imagine what that addressee would like to read from you. Take into account the importance of the gift or service that you received from that recipient. Be careful with the jokes; don’t hurt anyone’s feelings. Once you finish the composition of the text of the message, read it again several times and imagine how its recipient could feel while and after reading it. Adjust its content if necessary.
Choose the Right Sender
When it comes to the person of the verb with which you address to the addressee, it is obvious that you ought to speak in the second person, in all the gratitude notes, even in the most formal ones. More exactly, you must use the pronoun “you” when expressing your gratitude for the presence, gift or service of the addressee. What about the sender of these cards? To put it more accurately, who should “speak” in the thank you cards: you, your spouse or both of you? You must know that all the three answers previously mentioned are correct. More precisely:
- Only you should express your gratitude especially to your attendants: the bridesmaids or the groomsmen. More exactly, only you should sign the gratitude notes that you dispatch to your wedding aides. I wrote this article for being read by both brides and grooms, so I don’t know if you’re the bride or the groom.
- Only your spouse should express his or her gratitude primarily to his or her attendants: the groomsmen or the bridesmaids.
- Both you and your spouse should “speak” in the messages that you send to almost all the other recipients. More precisely, both of you must sign these notes and also you should use the possessive adjective “our”; for example, in expressions like: “our home”, “our wedding”, “our parents”, “our gratitude”, etc.
The four tips presented in this article are very important and helpful when it comes to the wedding thank you card wording that you need to use in the gratitude messages that you or your spouse will send to the persons who attended your marriage reception or who sent you presents on this occasion. There are other useful tips on this topic, but they are revealed in another post that I published on this website. I invite you to read also that post.